Radical Dreamers

Yeah, so its song from Chrono Cross. It's also the title this year is supposed to follow.

Plebe year I named my yearbook Joan of Arc. Yuk year it was Death and Rebirth. Last year was declared Nachtengel

Joan of Arc was something my friend Eric called me when he was talking to my boyfriend of the time. He said I was a Joan of Arc of our High school. To this day I still don't know what he meant, but I have a couple interpretations that carry into my situation here. Joan is either thought of as a saint or a loon, she was eventually burned at the stake for carrying out what she believed in. People plebe year either treated me well or really .. not nice.

Death and Rebirth is the title of Evangelion episodes and describes an improvement in status. Could be the contrast between yuk and plebe year, moving into a new company and having a considerably better reputation. Or it could describe the recovery from the drama of first semester yuk year.

Nachtengel, night angel, its a happy hardcore song, a character of mine, and my alias for my website. It describes what I've been this whole time, a night hawk, an insomniac. Cow year being no exception, what with Bobby and Noble and Allison etc ...

And that brings me to this year, it hasn't past, but its been decided, its the one thing that hasn't changed about me since high school, maybe ever, I'm a dreamer.

Though it feels like this place is slowly killing me ....

Sure, I choose to be here and stay here, I'm still having a hellava time accepting my status and fate. I returned with an incredible optimism despite the fact that my car was broken down in Mass. and I was back at the Point, my personal Hell. I was eager to see all my friends, esp Peter and Bobby, but not so much Bobby anymore as it was Peter. I had a great job that required that I be cheerful and optimistic and spirited. I am a firstie.

It took less than 3 days to depress me. With the new comm and his policies, that make this place more like the world I hate and jeopardize my graduating and sanity. The retarded 1sgt for my company who made my room a three man room and hooked up his classmates with good rooms. My roomie who kept moving the furniture around in inefficient ways that after much grief eventually lead to the way I originally suggested. The sweltering, humid weather that was worse than anything I could imagine, perpetually sweating though my clothes. I couldn't find Peter or Dan. I lost my privies. I was sucking.